12:00 PM
I'm not anorexic- look at me; I'm average and gross. I'll never be a beautiful skeleton.
Another carb binge because I'm pathetic. I'm worthless. I'm fat and disgusting. I need to lose weight. I need to get to 118. I don't care if I die...I can't keep living like this: starve, binge, exercise, binge, eat normal, eat normal, exercise, binge, starve.
I hope I don't get fat- that's a given but I don't want to fail at life. I want to be perfect. I don't want pity.. I just want to be 10 pounds lighter. Then I'll be happy, maybe?
11:30 PM
After taking 8 diet pills I feel alittle better. I did a few sets of jumping jacks and my hunger vanished shortly after. Tomorrow I will attempt to starve for the day...or just avoid carbs.
I could be with ten other people right now and I'd still feel lonely. I'm always lonely. I just wanna be alone an starve until my weight is so low I could binge off of my favorite ice cream and never get fat. By the way my favorite ice cream is peanut butter cup or moose tracks.
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